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Satire

SaddleCrack School District switching to AI Teachers

Aubrey Bertino -
The 21st century is starting to look more and more like a science fiction film everyday, and our school is no exception to these...
Satire

Mr. Fukuda: A Science Teacher With Secrets in His Coffin?

MVHS Staff -
 A group of bats has been spotted not one, but multiple times, circling around Fukuda’s door when dusk hits. For many years, the suspicions...
Satire

This Year’s Prom Revealed to be Held At Family Restaurant Chuck E Cheese

Sophie Mclean -
      It has been revealed that prom will be held at Chuck E Cheese, a place fun for the whole family and...
Satire

Titanic II: The Best Movie To Come Out of the Twenty-First Century

Sophie Mclean -
     Moving. Attention-Grasping. Astonishing. These words alone show the magnificence of  the revolutionary Titanic mockbuster Titanic II, where the stakes are raised to the extreme...
Satire

OUR LAST ISSUE

MVHS Staff -
     Today, April 2nd, marks an inconsolable day for Mission Viejo High School; our stronghold of a newspaper, The Diablo Dispatch, a publication that’s existed...
Satire

April Fools! A Pablo Story

Sarah Green -
Satire

Mr. Zides Mistaken for Chinese Spy Balloon

MVHS Staff -
     Mission Viejo High School’s very own assistant principal, Michael Zides, was shot down last weekend after being mistaken as a spy balloon. Yes, everybody's...
Satire

Dinosaur Fossil Find Shuts Down MVHS Campus

MVHS Staff -
Mission Viejo High School will be closing for a year due to the recently discovered dinosaur bones at the farm. ...
Opinion

English is Not Red

MVHS Staff -
  To everyone who says that English is the color red… you are wrong. How can English possibly be red when it is clearly green?...
Opinion

Circle Waffle Supremacy

MVHS Staff -
    Running late to school?... grab a waffle. To make an Eggo waffle all you need is a microwave or a toaster. The Eggo is...
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Latest

D4VD and The Murder of Celeste Rivas Hernandez

     D4VD, whose real name is David Anthony Burke, is now a major suspect in the murder of Celeste Rivas Hernandez. Celeste Rivas Hernandez was...

2025: A Year in Review

The year 2025 had been a year of change, reflection, and adjustment. People all over the world continued to face the challenges left over...

MVHS Marching Band and Color Guard wins first place.

Taking first place in the 2A division with a score of 73.82, The MVHS Marching Band and Color Guard was victorious at the Champions...

MVHS Marching Band and Color Guard Wins Fifth Division Championships

       On November 22, 2025, the Mission Viejo Marching Band and Color Guard took first place in 2A Division Championships for the Western Band Association. ...

Mission Viejo Wrestling Insight

     Mission Viejo Wrestling is one of the sports at Mission Viejo that anyone, girl or boy, can attend. As the class isn't...

A Tale so Magical, It Needed Two Trips Down the Yellow Brick Road

     Movie viewers are getting tired of excessive sequels that value quantity over quality. Story lines that could be compacted into one movie are being...

The Top Christmas Gifts Everyone Wants This Year

  Every year, people search for gifts to add on their wishlist or what to give to a significant other. Even though everyone has different...

December’s Dress Code: Silhouettes, Patterns, and Fur, Oh My!

 Just a blink of an eye and it's already a whole new season with tons of new looks and trends, and it looks like...

Desensitized to Disaster: School Shootings Continue the Torment

     School shootings are not just a tragedy of the past, but a calamity of the present. There have been 53 school shootings...
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